Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Non-Commital Make-Out

I'm sure we've all heard of it. And I'm sure alot - if not most of the singles (and recently non-singles) I know - have experienced it.
Now - for those of you who don't know the definition - it means just what it says. Making out without any commitment. And in most cases this works out fantastic. It's great times without all the strings attached.
Then there are those times when these 'sessions' become more frequent. And for some reason, emotions/strings start to become involved. That's never a good thing. But the worst part is when one person has those emotions/strings and the other person doesn't.
I had this happen with some friends. We hung out and had good times. They started to do the NCMO thing - and it was still fine with no problem. Then the one started to get attached and think/hope it was more than it was.
And well.... the rest is history really.
Things weren't said that should've been. Emotions, egos, and friendships were hurt. People felt used, abused and unloved. Which is completely understandable - however things were stated. When a person does one thing, but acts another, it's hard not to be confused and hurt.
The thing that sucks is that the person never said that his/her feelings had changed. If that had been said, then I think things would've turned out differently. But it wasn't said, therefore making the situation end badly. And my friends both getting hurt in the end.
So - my advice to all: Be careful what you're doing. NCMO is fun and common among us young single people, but can be painful and not worth it. I speak from past experiences as well as seeing it from other people. And I love having friends who are close and can enjoy each other in groups as well as in private kissing, but I would rather have them be happy and enjoy each other without getting hurt in the end.
Or if you are going to be kissing - be sure to TALK to each other. That's the key - if things start to change, talk about it. And then I think ultimately things will work out okay. If the talking stops the NCMO, I'm sorry, but at least you won't get hurt. And that's more important, right??

1 comment:

Alice Wills Gold said...

K...I am cracking up at the honest...just love it.

Looking back..I wish I would have never engaged in any NCMO...seriously. I can see how my willingness to engage in that activity has also brought the same issues into my marriage.

We women got to have more value on ourselves, and not just give it away. Those men need to learn to not just take it either. And they only way they learn that is if you make them earn it.

When are you going on that mission?